Here We Go Again

Credit: New York Times online, October 20, 2020

There is no missing it, the United States is heading in the wrong direction when it comes to Covid-19 infections. I am deeply worried and conflicted when I hear this news. During last night’s evening news, I heard people speaking of “Covid fatigue”. Today marks the two month anniversary of my children testing positive. Two months that this virus has been traveling around the different systems in my body. They have Covid fatigue? I think I could tell them something about Covid fatigue.

When we tested positive, many people said we were the only people they knew “in real life” with the virus. Yesterday, I was considering the fact that if the projections are accurate, we could potentially be acquainted with many people who end up testing positive. The community of Covid patients and Covid survivors would grow. I wondered if this growth would also spark an increase in public compassion for those afflicted. Quickly I remembered having the exact same thought process when the president became infected, and it did not have the desired outcome.

As more people are infected, don’t survive, or survive with complications, how will in change policy? How will it drive changes to health care, schools, and first responders? These are the real essential services that have been completely disregarded. While our professional sports teams built bubbles, and our government officials (allegedly) had daily rapid tests, our schools were left with their own limited budgets to cobble together plans that are failing dramatically nationwide. There is no federal data being collected on how schools are performing and the outbreaks they cause, but the information is out there. An American would have to live under a rock to not know about the limited access to PPE that our health care workers and first responders struggle to obtain to this day. Will the disease being more pervasive in our communities drive change?

I am deeply worried about the coming months. New reports have predicted fast accelerations over the coming weeks. Another scientist predicts we will be in our darkest days around the holidays. Someone went so far as to say we will not come out of this until March. On one hand, in this household, we feel somewhat relieved we have already been infected. We assume we are somewhat protected which means a lot since my husband works in a hospital with Covid patients.

Last night my husband and I were discussing Thanksgiving. He has to work and so does my daughter. My parents were going to come for the day, but we don’t know what to do. I don’t want them to be alone. We assume we cannot infect them now, but there are so many unknowns that create so much anxiety. I can tell my mom is feeling overwhelmingly depressed. My dad is deeply sucked into the election which isn’t healthy either. I try to engage with them every day and distract them, but I know they feel trapped. This is certainly not the retirement anyone would imagine.

There are so many stressors right now. Family members feeding heavily on a Fox News diet who have dismissed us because we are overplaying “The China Virus” that “everyone gets over in 10-14 days. Just look at the President!”. Family members who have succumbed to their addictions and who are lost and need to find a safe haven. Friends who post selfies out at local bars and then complain that schools remain closed because the virus continues to spike. My son who will have his first day of school tomorrow since March 15th, in a mask, behind a plexi-glass shield, for three hours.

My heart breaks for what is to come.

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